Carpenter rant…………

What is it with men taking instructions from a woman?? It makes me mad enough to spin on my head……the carpenters who're working to make our library/study are doing a good job…I am hopeful of posting pictures of it when its done……but I find myself getting increasingly pissed off when I give them instructions…..firstly, they'll always tell me whatever I ask them to do isn't a good idea…..when questioned, they'll always lamely say that "hum toh hamesha aisa hi banaatey hai" (we always make it like this) which is no explanation at all….finally when they do agree to make the changes I want, they will do it so grudgingly that I wonder if I would have been better off just agreeing to get it done they way they wanted……

Take for instance the height of the work table ….. I stand tall and proud at 5ft 2 inches….i need the worktable to be 30 inches high so that I don't kill myself with spondylosis as I sit for the remainder of the time that I will use this as a home office…..they've been told a hundred times, measured and marked also as many times…..yet they make it 3-4 inches higher……. Now I want to really take that electric saw to their necks……we go in….take the measurements again….make the markings….only to be told by them that it is too low!! For whom?? You?? You butthead…just make it for me to be able to sit there without wincing in pain!! Why cant you get it….. I have had them redo it three times already….smiling and explaining patiently even though I want to slice their heads off……then they say, it will be too low when the chair comes and hits my knees……I want to scream that I have exactly the kind of chair I want in mind….and no I will make sure it doesn't hit my knees….

Take another instance of putting on the veneer…..this is a thin sheet of wood, with natural grains (that I have chosen) which will give out a feeling that we've used decent wood (instead of the ply its actually made of) ….. to line the insides of the book cases, instead of all the wood being laid so that the grains remain in one direction, they lay them vertically and horizontally on the insides of the bookshelves….when I asked them what twisted logic made them do that, they looked at me like I was some deranged woman obsessed with the direction of the sheets of wood being laid……aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh chain saw somebody one day soon……so I explained…that it would look very bad, to not have everything in one direction….to which one cheeky mr carpenter replies…. "par yahan toh kitaben aayengi….cover ho jaayega" (there will be books here to cover this)….i throw him a murderous look that makes him put his tail between his legs and ask him to rip it off and do it again….adding "oh I won't be paying for the stuff you just wasted"

Every evening, when k manages to come while they are still working, or the following morning before he leaves for work and they've already arrived to pound my brains for the day…he inspects their work and tells them the same thing I have said….. The response he gets "theek hai, kar dengey sahib" (ok we will do it sir)…. I cant believe it.….. and all this after I have turned over a new leaf, not once screamed or sworn at them….and generally been of extreme sunny disposition in all my interactions with them….

Bah!! I just want them out of my house….I want them to do my bidding ….. and I want to throw that party to inaugurate k's favourite place on earth. Amen.