Saturday, November 7, 2009

mid blog crisis

Seems like i am not alone in my mid blog crisis. a lot of bloggers out there are expressing similar thoughts. So what is this mid blog crisis? Most bloggers start writing for many reasons, a platform to express themselves, to keep a diary, as a platform to update friends and family about their lives. Whatever the reason, we see ourselves here... we give this space a personality that reflects our own....we feel happy when someone visits and comments....atleast i do....

i started this blog a little over two years ago, i didnt think anyone would read it....a little later, i started Escapades as my recipe journal.... this was before the social media revolution with twitter and fb took over the world. I love it when people read escapades, cos that was essentially for the world to see what i was cooking up... Random Thoughts however remained more personal... i came here to rant, to bitch and to talk occasionally about stuff that was important to me....

there are two things on my mind about my two blogs (actually i have more... but well, we'll talk about just two)

the cooking blog, gave me a lot of stress.... is my writing up to the mark, are the recipes i post blog worthy, are the pictures better than sex... so on and so forth... this is just about appearance.... then there is the great blogging clique... the popularity contests... who's commenting on who's blog, who's getting friendly with who... which entries get the maximum appreciation and praise,  the hit counter... that little numerical widget that counts the number of visitors you have had....and ofcourse the various badges that tell you what your ranking is.....I started the blog because i wanted to.... i will write there as my mood pleases.... i've had several "well meaning" friends tell me how to increase my stats, get more visitors, leave a trail and make money out of my blog. To say that this has made me aghast on several occasions is putting it mildly... sure you blog the way you want to... but please stop from telling me what to do.... it gets competitive, it gets silly... it gets too serious for its own good and the joy that came out of blogging is buried deep within the posts.... A lot of the cooking blogs i followed initially have disappeared. Some bloggers dont post anymore and increasingly the ones that do have spoken about the same things i have just now.....Call me stubborn... but i am sticking to my guns... or shall i say posts and pictures that please me!!

Then there is the delicate question of what and how much to reveal on the personal blog... i know for sure, that over time a lot of people i didnt think would, started reading the blog. so even if i was in a bad mood, wanted to write about my work or the lack of it, stuff that bothers me, like the incessant "advise" i get about having a child, the reasons i dont want to, or stuff that i just want to vent about,.... will send people who matter up the wall.... and worry for my mental and physical well being., or interpret what i wrote and why...so over time, i have come here less, kept to the mundane and pondered over writing anonymously....

Then there is this larger than life image that we all try to portray through any social media that we are a part of, not just blogging... you know, the kind of FB updates that tell the world that we "love adventure".. i wonder if the same love for adventure would exist if there was no FB to update a status on..... so we cultivate an image... of larger than life, of exclusivity, or style or whatever the else.... i have met a lot of bloggers offline in the last two years.... there have been only two results... either the person behind the personna is better than what they appear on the blog.... or they are such a let down that i dont even want to read their blogs again cos they are so effing fake in real life.... yeah!! there i said it!!

So after 2+ years of blogging, i admit, i still dont know how to "optimise" or "monetise" or make sense of all of this any better than i was doing earlier.... i think my head is in the right place, cos i am saying "to each his own"

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