here, there and all that

moody, crabby and eternally wanting to sleep is currently how i feel. Its been a week since appa went back to ahmd. the week he was here was furious house hunting and while i enjoyed it, i realised how blessed K and I were to find and fall in love with this house the minute we saw it. Did i tell you that this was the first and only house we saw? I walked in, said yeah nice ventilation... spacious...and oooooo i love the french style doors.... so great for parties.... lets buy it! that was it! 6 years later, i still love my house....while i will always crave for a space that has a yard so i can do some more gardening and have a dog, i will always love this house. It was completely built and was the last apt available... so i didnt have to visualise what it would look like when it was still cement and bricks! all that househunting made me look back at pics of when we'd just moved in... my god! the amount of stuff i have accumulated! no major furniture...the same stuff gets tossed about and rearranged.... but knick knacks galore... and i still am not done! the house is always a work in progress....

a few things that happened when appa was here

• i know exactly how K will be at 68. you can't escape your genes...(i mean this in a good way...hell i am turning into my mom anyways)
• he's just as lost without me as his father is minus his mom!
• i love listening to appa, getting to know of his childhood and his life... somewhere i feel like i am making up for missed time.... i miss my dad the most when i am around my fil
• he (fil) loves to tell stories! whatever made me think he was a man of few words!
• i got over my fear of cooking for him. when you figure out he is anyways at your mercy, it helps!
• i ate a lot! having another person sit across you at the table at lunchtime is different from eating in front of the laptop!
• We (appa and I) made kozhukattai's for ganesh chathurthi. they turned out great, but i didnt take pics cos they were not photogenic!

I also cribbed less and tried to be more patient with myself and K. I am trying to think of the bigger picture at all times and it has helped me with my temper. B and J had their housewarming on the 10th. Everything thankfully went off well cos I was so paranoid about the food... neednt have worried, it was fab. Now need to see how the rest of the house and the woodwork turns out. So far everything looks good.

I've realised its been more than a year that K and I have gone on a realtime holiday. Trips to and with family dont count! i need to head out...somewhere...anywhere will do! but i need to go! 

have decided to make some sweeping changes to my balcony gardens so that i can accommodate some homegrown veggies too. before the weather gets colder.... i know i am late, but what the hell!

fabulous progress

am happy to report, that K has gone and outdone himself and silenced me about any doubts i had about him and focus. when we went to the gym after a month last week, the trainers all lined up and one even asked if he'd had liposuction! ofcourse i felt like cracking (the trainer's) skull, after all the hard work and sweat he'd shed, but it was also a victory for K. I remember when he first joined, they crowded around him to give him gyan.... first he shocked them with his stamina and then with his weight loss... it was like a kick in the teeth... me? well lets just say i went back to the start point! but the main thing is what he's been able to achieve! love you k man.. you showed me that i was so wrong...and i now know that if you make up your mind about anything, no matter what, you will achieve it.

fitness update

a few posts ago, i wrote about K and me taking the fitness plunge....lets just say that i have played truant for more than a month...managing just a few days of free hand exercises and some yoga... but overall have lost about 4kgs and put back 1 on cos of all the feasting (with guests at home its tough to convince them why the host is going to eat salad!). so instead of whipping myself about slacking off, i am reaffirming, rescheduling my goals and moving on ahead....

but i came here to document K's awesome determination, hardwork and results.... he did the math...and he has the determination of a nazi.... gym may not have been such  a regular feature this past month, but badminton is...and he is playing 5 times a week.... he's lost what i can say are results only slimming centres can give you! and i am amazed! in awe and with respect for anyone who can stay that focussed.... yes ...even my husband...cos we always look at the flaws...he stumped me! yet again. I've known him half of my life, and i am still shocked....i never thought he'd get this far! he's inspired me totally now! and i think it just reinforced what i wrote in the last post about me not getting thru many points in life if he wasnt by my side!

ok...this was supposed to not be mushy! so i shall stop...cant wait to head over to the balcony where my now much lighter husband awaits me groggy eyed! have a lovely day you all.

people in your life

do you believe that the people in your life are there for a reason? and so is the case with the ones that aren't there are also there for a reason? I do...

I've been thinking a lot of the people in my life...the ones that are still there, some I've grown closer to, some I've kept at arm's length. Some have amazed me by what they can do with their lives, taught me lessons on how to follow your heart and be brave....some have taught me the same lessons with examples of what not to do....

i told K this morning that i would have broken in mind and spirit many times in life, if he wasn't by my side. and today was one of the days when i truly thanked god for his presence..... he's been my pillar of strength, my fiercest ally and most honest critic. there are times when only he has the balls to tell it like it is and although at that moment i may feel like crushing his head, i'd not have it any other way!

the friends who call me beautiful when i want to cry after getting onto the weighing scales, the ones who tell me i can do anything i ever want to .... the ones who encourage me, silently and with gentle chiding.... the ones who will grow old with me and always be there in my life no matter which part of the world we live in....

the ones who with their nastiness and highhandedness made me rejoice that i am not them....the ones who taught me how great it is to be humble, which doesnt necessarily mean that you are a doormat, the ones who have made me thank my upbringing and everything else that doesnt make me fake or false....

the ones who have truly earned my admiration and respect, the ones who lost it because their masks fell, they all make my life richer...thank you!

weekend this and that

what is it about power or importance that makes you feel like you can get away with anything? on friday, along with a couple of friends, i went for what i thought would be a ghazal performance in an intimate setting. there is this place that serves as a platform for artists and for the encouragement of art and literature called lamakaan in hyd. Its a nice old bungalow that's being used. the idea behind it is very unique and it strives to be not for profit...the patrons are pretty well connected in the literati circles and i guess its a double edged sword...you need to be known to bring people / performers of repute....and that in turn attracts the literati ....

anyways...in true hyderabadi style, people began to assemble a little after 30 mins of the scheduled time on a really rainy evening...the artist came in almost an hour late and began singing right away... what appalled me was however the crowd behaviour... if you want to continue to talk...rather loudly and with obvious disrespect, dont sit in a mehfil....everyone..including the patron saint of the place, his wife and particularly his son, were jabbering non stop... mundane things... like where to put additional chairs...and asking people to make more room, and the kid was busy kicking people...or exclaiming loudly after every game won on the phone he was playing with.... the singing was totally the sideshow....if you wanted that...then why do thru the pain of inviting a maestro albeit who is in the autumn of his career? if the person who is supposed to lead by example does this, naturally us herds will follow... so whether it was inquiring where a dress was purchased or dinner was eaten had to happen there! i was so disgusted, i walked out after 3 songs...the sham went on for about an hour more i think...

the portico of the place had a light fixture inside which were trapped many (now dead) critters including a lizard... kind of symbolic of what that place will become i guess....

saturday was fabulous... i had a very fun chocolate making class after a long time... in the evening, the gym proved to be a pain in the neck and so was the effing instructor...who tried to bend my back into submission and when i said i have a bad back, tried to tell me, i would not lose weight unless i did what he told me... who does 45 reps of 10 exercises on day one? who makes these guys fitness instructors? working out in a damp shirt gave me fever by the night and on sunday i was in bed the whole day... watched reruns of friends... but i'd have gladly done that minus the fever....

my brand new shiny camera hasnt still gotten to me... i am tentatively taking pictures which arent very good! i need to learn the basic settings atleast!

yesterday my cousins dropped in... i made some snacks as i wasnt sure if dinner would be suitable... fake mutton shikampuri kebabs that the hardcore carnivores couldnt make out were made of soy nuggets! K sank his teeth into them with relish till i told him it was fake! you should have seen his face! i had a fun time...and i miss those times when we just gathered at family get togethers and hung out! now we have to plan...for weeks!

its still pleasant weather in hyd minus the rains... road and drainage work in the lane continues at snailspace...so more slush and kitchad for a while i guess....